Now being written is the book: Notes & Quotes From the Good Doctor. Listed below are some of the many quotes in that book that famous people, Dr. D., the Good Doctor, and I, Squire Bin Forever, have written. You are welcome to use them in your writing and speaking if you make sure you identify one of us as the author and the dates.
The following original quotes are being added to regularly.
Notes and Quotes
From the Good Doctor!
Takes on Human Communication
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*The statement “I don’t know” almost never means that one doesn’t know. It usually means that “I don’t want to tell you.
*There are two types of a real “I don’t know”. One is actually saying that “I know almost nothing at all about ____.” The other is saying “I do not know what I want to know about “A” and “B.
*When the word “but” is put into a sentence, that word tells the listener to erase everything that was said before the “but” and pay attention only to what follows, e.g., “I do want to see you ‘but’ I am very busy today.”
*If you hear someone “butting” you all the time in a pattern, be aware that they have an agenda regarding you or the topic under discussion.
*If you find yourself ‘butting” someone or some topic all the time in a pattern, you are right in that it feels just like “butting your head against a wall.
*If you want to speak without using “but”, check out this approach. Say, “I hear you suggest ______. As an alternative I suggest ______.” Then debate.
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*My wife thinks I say too much------------------------------- Probably.
*Parallel monologues are often what people offer each other when they are in the same place as another but not with another.
*Much of human communication is a monologue delivered to anyone who will listen. A real dialogue allows many to express and has the chance of leading to more discovery.
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*When my monologue is long, those who are listening are often confused, get lost, or get left behind
* When I have too much information or too many choices, I often get confused.
*When one wants to encourage another to learn what ”I know that you don’t know,” encourage them to engage in deep thought on a topic you suggest. Deep thought is a positive activity that doesn’t blame and results in both a thinking process and outputs/outcomes that are positive.
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*The test of whether you are a thinker or not is whether you go to the ocean by yourself and preach or listen.
*The message sent is often not the message that is heard. This is why a good messenger will repeat basic messages over and over.
·
*Human communication has been greatly enhanced by electronic technologies but human relationships have suffered as a result of the misuse of these technologies. The older generation loves emailing and texting for its ease. One can communicate via either when one wants to but t is usually still one-way communication. The kids use texting right when they use texting in a back and forth style.
·
*Even the younger generation misuses texting when one sees two young people sitting at the same table texting back and forth to each other. Or worse yet, to someone else who is not in their "Now".
·
*Often when people offer a half-truth on a topic, they are either lazy or they have an agenda and don’t want you to know the whole truth.·
·
*The statement “I don’t know” almost never means that one doesn’t know. It usually means that “I don’t want to tell you.
*There are two types of a real “I don’t know”. One is actually saying that “I know almost nothing at all about ____.” The other is saying “I do not know what I want to know about “A” and “B.
*When the word “but” is put into a sentence, that word tells the listener to erase everything that was said before the “but” and pay attention only to what follows, e.g., “I do want to see you ‘but’ I am very busy today.”
*If you hear someone “butting” you all the time in a pattern, be aware that they have an agenda regarding you or the topic under discussion.
*If you find yourself ‘butting” someone or some topic all the time in a pattern, you are right in that it feels just like “butting your head against a wall.
*If you want to speak without using “but”, check out this approach. Say, “I hear you suggest ______. As an alternative I suggest ______.” Then debate.
·
*My wife thinks I say too much------------------------------- Probably.
*Parallel monologues are often what people offer each other when they are in the same place as another but not with another.
*Much of human communication is a monologue delivered to anyone who will listen. A real dialogue allows many to express and has the chance of leading to more discovery.
·
*When my monologue is long, those who are listening are often confused, get lost, or get left behind
* When I have too much information or too many choices, I often get confused.
*When one wants to encourage another to learn what ”I know that you don’t know,” encourage them to engage in deep thought on a topic you suggest. Deep thought is a positive activity that doesn’t blame and results in both a thinking process and outputs/outcomes that are positive.
·
*The test of whether you are a thinker or not is whether you go to the ocean by yourself and preach or listen.
*The message sent is often not the message that is heard. This is why a good messenger will repeat basic messages over and over.
·
*Human communication has been greatly enhanced by electronic technologies but human relationships have suffered as a result of the misuse of these technologies. The older generation loves emailing and texting for its ease. One can communicate via either when one wants to but t is usually still one-way communication. The kids use texting right when they use texting in a back and forth style.
·
*Even the younger generation misuses texting when one sees two young people sitting at the same table texting back and forth to each other. Or worse yet, to someone else who is not in their "Now".
·
*Often when people offer a half-truth on a topic, they are either lazy or they have an agenda and don’t want you to know the whole truth.·
Takes on Values
*Values are foundation blocks to buildings as they are to relationships.
*Remember the old biblical story about a house built on sand without a good foundation and how it will collapse, even the good looking ones.
*To have a good house it must be built with good quality materials and by good quality workmanship. In the human house, good quality workmanship is assertive communication, poor quality workmanship is passive-aggressive communication. Good quality materials are relationships; bad quality materials are related to materialism.
*You change values by focusing on the new ones that you want to add. In doing so, those get stimulated and give out rewards which displace the old values. You avoid resentment feelings and learn how to turn the volume up of the new ones which eventually becomes loud enough to drown out the old value’s noise.
*Values are foundation blocks to buildings as they are to relationships.
*Remember the old biblical story about a house built on sand without a good foundation and how it will collapse, even the good looking ones.
*To have a good house it must be built with good quality materials and by good quality workmanship. In the human house, good quality workmanship is assertive communication, poor quality workmanship is passive-aggressive communication. Good quality materials are relationships; bad quality materials are related to materialism.
*You change values by focusing on the new ones that you want to add. In doing so, those get stimulated and give out rewards which displace the old values. You avoid resentment feelings and learn how to turn the volume up of the new ones which eventually becomes loud enough to drown out the old value’s noise.
Takes on Feelings and Values
·
*A survey was taken and six out of seven dwarfs were not Happy.
*A survey was taken and six out of seven dwarfs were not grumpy. A survey was taken and six out
of seven dwarfs were not sleepy. A survey was taken and six out of seven dwarfs were not dopey. Etc……….
*Just because you are not thinking doesn’t mean that I have to stop thinking.
*Wishing or wanting for things makes for great lists, but for something to happen about the wish/want, action is
required.
*Getting individuals to stop overvaluing feelings is like getting the NRA to stop thinking about guns.
*Feelings are like the icing on a cake. They make the cake attractive and taste good, but they are not the cake.
*Values are the ‘shoulds’ of life but to be “should on” is no fun.
*Many times feelings trump values which in turn trump logic. That is one reason we humans spend so little time
thinking.
*We Americans continue to collect emotional trading stamps, called ”brown stamp collecting” when shopping in our emotional market. When our book is full, we may turn them in for a guilt free (perhaps) temper tantrum, drinking spree, and so on. It is healthier to refuse the stamps when offered and to express emotions “in the now” and move on.
*The dramas experienced by humans are better than any of those on day-time television.
*I wonder if those persons who devour television sitcoms, have too much or too little drama in their own lives.
*Awareness of feelings is simply awareness of feelings. Expressing feelings is simply expressing feelings. Having change occur as an aftereffect of feelings requires action.
*The expression of a feeling is normal, natural and healthy. The storing up of feelings at any time is unhealthy and is to be avoided. The kids get it right when in their interaction a mistake is made and feelings follow. They say “my bad” and all move on.
*Most people want their feelings to be positive before they venture forward in a change. Except that it doesn’t work that way. Change occurs and if it is good change, good feelings follow.
*If you value “why” a lot but do not value “what” very much, “who”, "how", ”when” and “where” seldom come into play.
*A life’s journey that is primarily based on emotions will be full of ups and down, like an elevator. Elevators get you from one place to another but in a limited way. If you want to live a more level life, chose another vehicle in which to travel.
*What is this world coming to? Depression and Guilt are no longer the result of emotional factors. Depression is the result of mistaken or erroneous thoughts one has and guilt really is a judgment or value conflict you do to yourself.
*A good old fashioned cry is still the best way to wash away mild bad feelings.
*Most people want their feelings to be positive before they venture forward in a change. Except that it doesn’t work hat way. Change occurs and if it is good change, good feelings follow.
*Most men feel best about old clothes. We love our oldest hat and jeans that have real holes in them. Yet women expect us to feel good about going to a clothing store to buy new duds? Don’t they understand men’s feelings?
*Here is a paradox about jeans with holes n them. Women love to buy jeans with holes artificially put in them but can't understand how men like the same thing done through wear. Perhaps it has nothing to do with the hole and just has to do with spending of emotions?
*Those women that do understand men’s feelings do the following. Get your man into the clothing store however you can. Once your man sees himself in a mirror, his self-admiration will take over and he will actually fight his wife/partner for whose credit card will be used.
*Those women that do understand men’s feelings know that the above approach doesn’t always work because what a man sees in a mirror is not what a woman sees in person. So the next strategy is buy the clothes herself, put them in his drawer and he may never miss his old duds--- If he does miss them and complains, go back to strategy #1 and take him shopping with you as he is more of a shopper than you give him credit for.
*In desperation, after everything else has failed, the woman should send her husband/partner out of the house in the nude he will love that part) with a $100.00 bill and tell him not to come home until he goes and picks up the clothes you have for him on layaway. He will love the excitement of this all and odds have it that he will come home with the clothes. He may be escorted by an officer in blue who will not believe your story but will release him to you telling you “not to let this happen again.” I can tell you that make-up sex that evening will be joyful as your husband/partner marvels at your creativity.
*It is hard to know who originated the saying “It is a football team with a university connected to it” because there are so many of them.
·
*A survey was taken and six out of seven dwarfs were not Happy.
*A survey was taken and six out of seven dwarfs were not grumpy. A survey was taken and six out
of seven dwarfs were not sleepy. A survey was taken and six out of seven dwarfs were not dopey. Etc……….
*Just because you are not thinking doesn’t mean that I have to stop thinking.
*Wishing or wanting for things makes for great lists, but for something to happen about the wish/want, action is
required.
*Getting individuals to stop overvaluing feelings is like getting the NRA to stop thinking about guns.
*Feelings are like the icing on a cake. They make the cake attractive and taste good, but they are not the cake.
*Values are the ‘shoulds’ of life but to be “should on” is no fun.
*Many times feelings trump values which in turn trump logic. That is one reason we humans spend so little time
thinking.
*We Americans continue to collect emotional trading stamps, called ”brown stamp collecting” when shopping in our emotional market. When our book is full, we may turn them in for a guilt free (perhaps) temper tantrum, drinking spree, and so on. It is healthier to refuse the stamps when offered and to express emotions “in the now” and move on.
*The dramas experienced by humans are better than any of those on day-time television.
*I wonder if those persons who devour television sitcoms, have too much or too little drama in their own lives.
*Awareness of feelings is simply awareness of feelings. Expressing feelings is simply expressing feelings. Having change occur as an aftereffect of feelings requires action.
*The expression of a feeling is normal, natural and healthy. The storing up of feelings at any time is unhealthy and is to be avoided. The kids get it right when in their interaction a mistake is made and feelings follow. They say “my bad” and all move on.
*Most people want their feelings to be positive before they venture forward in a change. Except that it doesn’t work that way. Change occurs and if it is good change, good feelings follow.
*If you value “why” a lot but do not value “what” very much, “who”, "how", ”when” and “where” seldom come into play.
*A life’s journey that is primarily based on emotions will be full of ups and down, like an elevator. Elevators get you from one place to another but in a limited way. If you want to live a more level life, chose another vehicle in which to travel.
*What is this world coming to? Depression and Guilt are no longer the result of emotional factors. Depression is the result of mistaken or erroneous thoughts one has and guilt really is a judgment or value conflict you do to yourself.
*A good old fashioned cry is still the best way to wash away mild bad feelings.
*Most people want their feelings to be positive before they venture forward in a change. Except that it doesn’t work hat way. Change occurs and if it is good change, good feelings follow.
*Most men feel best about old clothes. We love our oldest hat and jeans that have real holes in them. Yet women expect us to feel good about going to a clothing store to buy new duds? Don’t they understand men’s feelings?
*Here is a paradox about jeans with holes n them. Women love to buy jeans with holes artificially put in them but can't understand how men like the same thing done through wear. Perhaps it has nothing to do with the hole and just has to do with spending of emotions?
*Those women that do understand men’s feelings do the following. Get your man into the clothing store however you can. Once your man sees himself in a mirror, his self-admiration will take over and he will actually fight his wife/partner for whose credit card will be used.
*Those women that do understand men’s feelings know that the above approach doesn’t always work because what a man sees in a mirror is not what a woman sees in person. So the next strategy is buy the clothes herself, put them in his drawer and he may never miss his old duds--- If he does miss them and complains, go back to strategy #1 and take him shopping with you as he is more of a shopper than you give him credit for.
*In desperation, after everything else has failed, the woman should send her husband/partner out of the house in the nude he will love that part) with a $100.00 bill and tell him not to come home until he goes and picks up the clothes you have for him on layaway. He will love the excitement of this all and odds have it that he will come home with the clothes. He may be escorted by an officer in blue who will not believe your story but will release him to you telling you “not to let this happen again.” I can tell you that make-up sex that evening will be joyful as your husband/partner marvels at your creativity.
*It is hard to know who originated the saying “It is a football team with a university connected to it” because there are so many of them.